…it is still very hot in hell. Which means I didn’t make the short-list.

The kids are terribly disappointed. But after Bill hastened to remind me of my deep-rooted fears of falling out of planes into crocodile infested waters, I’m okay with it.

Now, instead of running around like a crazy woman thinking about passports for 7 people, wardrobes appropriate for lounging on the beach all day long, and who carries the best brand of footwear that can transition from light hiking to strolling through the surf, I can relax and turn my attention to less stressful topics like when I should go visit my parents this summer, what Latin program I should use with a reluctant learner, and how Bill and I can make the best use of the little time he has left before deployment.

What a relief!

I saw this at Charlotte’s blog and thought it was too funny to pass up. You type in “Unfortunately (your name)” – don’t forget the quotation marks – and see what comes up. Here is a short selection of what I found for me:

Unfortunately Michelle couldn’t make a four foot putt when she was fourteen and still can’t at (thirty-seven).

Unfortunately, Michelle thought she didn’t need any help. (Humility is a virtue with which I struggle.)

Unfortunately Michelle had now begun to associate with known-gang members. (Oh, my.)

Unfortunately Michelle has nearly ZERO power over the rest of the operations and less than zero power over NAVL’s sub-contractors. (Wow. Less than zero? Does that mean if I use reverse psychology, I do have an influence?)

Unfortunately, Michelle is unable to blog from her location in Guatemala. (If you don’t see me posting for a few days, this explains it.)

Unfortunately Michelle showed all the style savvy of Queen Elizabeth — not good. (Hey! If you can’t say something nice…)

Unfortunately, Michelle also began using drugs and alcohol and did not limit her use until late in her pregnancy. (That’s what happens when you hang out with gang members.)

Unfortunately, Michelle’s father, Ruben, was often blamed by her mother, Juanita, for their daughter’s aversion to the Church. (Water under the bridge, Dad.)

Unfortunately, Michelle is getting a bit fussy, and starting to whimper. (I’ll be better after my morning coffee.)

Unfortunately, Michelle’s commitment to her family, friends and career ties her to Manchester and would not be able to move to Australia. (Island Reef People, don’t you believe this for a minute.)

Unfortunately, Michelle’s prediction proved quite prophetic when disaster struck during the party. (Gang members + drugs = disaster. Prophecy or just common sense?)

This is the best one of all:

Unfortunately Michelle was made redundant in July 2007. (Now that hurts.)

It is interesting to note that dog saliva is just as difficult to wash off the mixer’s paddle as is dried mashed potatoes.

SFO Mom is giving away Michael Dubruiel’s book, The How To Book of the Mass.

Enter to win, or buy your own.

All proceeds go to an education fund for his children.

Really! You are amazing!

Take the time, 16 1/2 minutes, to watch this video. It’s a love story that will make you smile and make you want to make other people smile.

“You paid for parking, just for me?” (Trust me. It’s a romantic line.)

It’s Friday. Perhaps work or the kids or life in general has been beating you up this week. Watch this video. Instead of yelling at the kids to get dressed for the 5th time this morning, you will generously point out shirts that complement their eyes. Instead of being annoyed at their blankets and robes being strewn about the house, you will praise their creative tepee building skills.

Really. It’s an awesome video. And I saw it first over at June Cleaver After a Six-Pack who is, herself, an amazing woman. Funny. Strong. Incredible. Amazing!

Several years ago, I flippantly blogged that a book by Michael Dubruiel was “doing nothing” for me. I was embarrassed when the author left a comment. Blog Lesson #427: do not write anything that you wouldn’t say to a person’s face. I could have been more diplomatic.

Later that year, I redeemed myself by highly recommending his novena book, (Mention Your Request Here): The Church’s Most Powerful Novenas. I do love this book, and it is the first place I turn in times of desperation. Michael kindly sent me the newer edition when it was released.

This morning I learned that Michael Dubruiel died suddenly yesterday. My condolences to Amy Welborn and her children. This is such sad news.

Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord.

Peter says, “the crowing of the cock, and the barking of the farmer’s dog…what comes next, Mommy?”

And I say, “And felt the damp of the river fog.”

He repeats, then asks, “What comes next?”

“That rises after the sun goes down.”

And we continue through the next stanza, until finally I say enough.

No cheating. Who can name the poem and author?