Last night, Katie undressed for bed. Wearing nothing but her underwear, she gathered her dirty laundry and took it to the crowded bathroom to properly deposit it in the hamper. Fritz greets her by singing, “I see London; I see France; I see Katie’s underpants.” Katie dissolves into tears and comes into the room where I am directing bedtime traffic from the rocking chair.
“Go put your pajamas on, Katie,” was all I replied.
Honestly, what does she expect? Yes, I also chastised Fritz for teasing – his current raison d’etre. But 99 times out of 100 Katie leaves her dirty clothes on the floor of her bedroom. It seems to be the natural instinct of little girls to do precisely what is right at exactly the wrong moment to achieve the greatest grief and consternation for everyone, including themselves. And then she plays the role of victim, when really it was all her own doing. I don’t think that I do this, but every other person I’ve known to behave this way was female.
I believe God gives every child to exactly the right parents. Sometimes it is that a parent who struggled with some issue – like socks that must be on just so – is the only sort of person who could tolerate a child’s obsession with that issue. Sometimes it’s that a parent who despises a certain behavior is the only sort of person who could work to weed that behavior out of a child, lovingly of course. The former seems to be the case most between my son, Billy, and me. The latter seems to be the way it is with me and Katie.
It is my hope that by her adulthood, Katie will learn to foresee the consequences of her actions and choose to avoid roiling the pot instead of reveling in the mayhem. And, definitely, I hope she stops prancing around in her panties, too!
Reit This Way 
Now, now, go easy on us girls. They don’t call us the heart of the home for nothing! We’re supposed to have serious emotion and tenderness. Maybe children are given to certain parents for a reason, but maybe it’s the opposite reason. Maybe it’s more to teach us parents.
I am learning that with Ella. She can be manipulative, emotional, melodramatic, and sensitive. While extremes shouldn’t necessarily be tolerated, it seems God is teaching me to try to nurture her feminine and gentle side and not just be irritated all the time that she is that way, the way He made her. What would I do if He gave up on me and blew me off as being overly emotional? Just my two cents.
How is your back today?
My back is better, Nicole, thanks.
It’s the manipulative aspect that gets me…and worse, it’s the victim role she plays. I’m all for nurturing her feminine side, but she must learn that being feminine does not mean being helpless or coy and certainly does not mean having no control or responsibility for other’s reactions to your behavior.
Think about the rape cases where the woman’s clothing and behavior was brought up in the !&%$*&! perpetrator’s defense. No, he had no right to do it. But she had no business inciting that behavior either.