Culture shock: the confusion that results when one person of culture tries to have a conversation with a person lacking culture.

Billy was trying to talk about one of his favorite stories, Treasure Island. An older neighborhood boy accused him of watching Dora the Explorer, which has a show with the same name. I had to explain to Billy that the boy apparently didn’t know about Robert Louis Stevenson’s novel.

On Fridays during Lent, I like to pray the Stations of the Cross as a family. We light 14 candles and the kids take turns snuffing out one candle for every station. This will keep the attention of most children, even the toddler (ooo, fire!). Thanks to Monica for sending me the text for the children’s stations I posted below. I added the opening and closing prayers which I found on-line with much searching. There are many on-line versions of the stations, including this one for children with illustrations done by a 5th grader. Very nice.

Opening Prayer: God of power and mercy, in love your sent your Son that we might be cleansed of sin and live with you forever. Bless us as we gather to reflect on his suffering and death that we may learn from his examplethe way we should go. We ask this through that same Christ, our Lord. Amen.

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

1. Jesus Must Die.
Some of the people wanted Jesus to die. Jesus, You are willing to die for us. Thank you, Jesus.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

2. Jesus Takes His Cross
Jesus took the heavy cross with love. Jesus, help me to do hard things with love.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

3. Jesus Falls
Jesus, it was hard to carry the cross. You carried it for us. Thank you.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

4. Jesus Meets his Mother
Mary was sad to see Jesus suffer. She knew He must die for us. Thank you, Mary, for giving your son for us.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

5. Simon helps Jesus
Jesus found it hard to carry the heavy cross by himself. Simon helped him. Jesus, show me how to help others.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

6. Veronica helps Jesus
Veronica was sorry for Jesus. She wiped His face. Jesus, help me to be kind like Veronica.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

7. Jesus Falls the Second Time
Jesus fell a second time. He got up and carried the cross again. Thank you, Jesus, for carrying Your cross for us.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

8. The Women are Sorry for Jesus
Some women cried to see Jesus suffer. He spoke to them. Jesus, teach me to be sorry when I do wrong.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

9. Jesus Falls Again
Jesus fell again under His cross. He was very tired but did not stop. Jesus, help me to keep on trying to be good.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

10. Jesus’ Clothes are Taken
The soldiers took away Jesus’ clothes. They hurt him. Jesus, You suffered for us. Thank you.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

11. Jesus is Nailed to the Cross
Jesus forgave the men who hurt Him. He prayed, “Father, forgive them.” Jesus, teach me to forgive others who hurt me.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

12. Jesus Dies on the Cross
After three hours, Jesus dies on the cross. Jesus, You died so we can live with God in Heaven. Thank you for loving us so much.

Our Father…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

13. Jesus is Taken Down
Mary held Jesus in her arms. Mary, help me to love Jesus as you love Him.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

14. Jesus is Buried
The friends of Jesus put him in the tomb. Jesus, you died to save us. You rose again to bring us new life.

Hail Mary…

V: We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you.
R: Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.

15. Jesus Rises
Jesus you rose from the dead on Easter. You gave God’s life to us. Thank you, Jesus!

Glory Be…

Closing Prayer: Lord Jesus Christ, your passion and death is the sacrifice that unites earth and heaven and reconciles all people to you. May we who have faithfully reflected on these mysteries follow in your steps and so come to share your glory in heaven where you live and reign with the Father and the Holy Spirit one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Earlier today, I fed Pete some diced pears. Sounds pretty dull, right? Not to my kids. Pete had never had pears, so the new taste had him making some faces. Pete hasn’t had many chunky things to eat and is still getting the hang of chewing things (gumming them, really), so quite a bit was being spit out. The kids thought this was a riot. Who needs TV?

Later, Pete tried to stick his tongue out. He’s tongue-tied, so this is an effort for him. See him practice:

The pictures are dark because I’m using the “action” mode on the camera and we’re indoors and there are 4 children and one dopey adult with a camera crowding around and blocking the light.

Such over-stimulation has us all ready for a nap.

Soon, we’ll be heading out for a pancake supper. I must admit that Lent is one of my favorite church seasons. I love getting ready for the Feast.

I don’t remember where I heard it, but the story goes: a young man dies in a car accident. He stands in judgment and in his defense says that his death was sudden and he didn’t have time to prepare to “meet his Maker.” The Lord says, “But I gave you every Lent.”

And so, we get ready, because one day, the end will come. Many people wait for the Second Coming and try to see the signs that point to its imminent arrival. But the Lord will come to each of us in His own time, and it’d be good to be prepared.

I may not be here much over the next few weeks. I’ve got a lot of work to do.

I confess to Almighty God, and to you my brothers and sisters, that I have sinned through my own fault, in my thoughts and in my words, in what I have done, and in what I have failed to do, and I ask Blessed Mary, Ever Virgin, all the angels and saints, and you, my brothers and sisters, to pray for me to the Lord, our God.

I found the top of my desk. It was right where I expected it to be – under a huge mound of paper. The huge mound of paper is now three smaller mounds of paper.

One mound is in my “to-do” bin. It’s a big mound.

One mound is in my “to-file” box. It’s a bigger mound.

And one mound is in the garbage. It’s the biggest mound. It’s amazing how much can go straight from “to-do” or “to-file” to the garbage pile if only I procrastinate long enough.

Sunday was the usual morning of Mass followed by CCD.

Followed by let’s take Jenny for a ride so she falls asleep.

Followed by since she’s asleep, let’s run a few errands. But unfortunately, the 2 places we went did not have anything we needed. At least I had plenty of time to read the Sunday bulletin and the Operation Rice Bowl calendar the kids got at CCD. And Jenny and the baby had naps.

Followed by let’s go home and relax. Which we did. The kids played indoors and outdoors. Most of the afternoon we had the proper quota of children in our house – they just weren’t the right ones.

And the best part of the day came at evening when “The Big Man” came to dinner. TBM was supposed to come to dinner a few weeks ago, but canceled at the last minute. Dad had told the kids about TBM, a friend of his from work. He’s a pretty big guy. The kids could not wait to meet him. They were extremely disappointed when he didn’t come that last time. But Sunday night he came, he ate my stew and fruit salad and homemade rolls and declared them delicious. Of course, when one is a bachelor, any home cooking is likely delicious. But anyone who wants to come over and praise my cooking is welcome any time.

TBM is a nice guy. And although we are all special in the eyes of God, he’s not really any more special than the rest of us. My kids, though, absolutely love to have guests over. They think that guests are brought in strictly for their own entertainment.

When I was a kid, my siblings and I couldn’t wait to be excused if guests were over. Adults were boring. They sat around and talked. They asked annoying questions about schoolwork and hobbies. Catching their attention was dangerous. One might be expected to perform. We avoided being anywhere near them and preferred to go play. I don’t ever remember my mother even having to ask us to go outside or to another room because we were noisy.

My kids have not yet figured out that adults are boring. They think adults are very interesting. They can’t wait to see what kind of an adult might be coming over. If the adult is a woman, she might be given a bit more respect. In other words, my kids won’t generally jump on a woman as a way of saying hi, unless you happen to be Aunt Margaret. If you are a male guest, one of the boys will tests the waters by shooting at you with a toy gun with pretend bullets. If that gesture of hospitality is met with amusement, you next might be assailed with a volley of projectiles. Again, if the reaction is one of amusement, within minutes you could expect to be fully assaulted. And the girls will alternate between sitting on your lap and pulling your hair.

Fortunately, TBM likes kids and is an uncle of kids roughly the same age. I suppose I should be happy that my kids can relate to adults so well. Er, as long as the adult is fully capable of functioning at a juvenile level! But every now and then, adults, I’m sure, would prefer to just sit and do boring things like talk. At least, I would!

Assignment: scramble the names of five US states and give it to someone else to unscramble.

Fritz’s results:

1. s x a t e
2. a g v r n i i i
3. e t v w s i r i g a i n
4. h a m p s h i r e n e w
5. t e m v o r n

My favorite is # 4.

Saturday was overbooked.

First, everyone was tired and cranky. We didn’t get home from dinner until after 1030 pm. I had told the babysitting kids not to worry about putting my kids to bed. I don’t know why. My kids generally go to bed without TOO much fuss. So, they were bouncing off the walls until 11 pm, three hours after their usual bedtime.

Next morning, nobody slept in. It was Billy’s birthday, and they actually got up earlier and with more excitement then they did on Christmas morning. No joke. Jenny was particularly grumpy and I knew she wouldn’t last long into the day.

So we all went to the grocery store together. I needed fruit for a fruit salad. We went home. Jenny fell asleep in the car. Pete fell asleep soon after we got home. The rest of us grabbed a quick lunch, and then Bill took the three oldest to Chuck E Cheese which is what Billy wanted to do in celebration.

I was elated that I managed to dodge that trip. In fact, perhaps that was my plan all along and why I allowed the kids to stay up so late, knowing that Jenny would take an early nap.

{insert evil laughter here}

I had no rest while the gang was gone. Fortunately, miraculously, both babies slept the whole time. I made the fruit salad. I made a stew for Sunday’s dinner. I tidied the house. I did all the dishes. I was Die Ueberfrau. It felt so good to actually get things accomplished. Things actually stayed clean. Rooms did not get destroyed while my back was turned. It was great.

Then…

The gang came home. Bill’s parents and brother and sister came over for cake and presents. The little ones woke up. We had fun.

Then we kicked them out, and we packed the family up and went to the Cub Scouts’ Blue and Gold Banquet which is a big, fun party with food, skits and awards. We were excited because Fritz was supposed to get his Bobcat badge. He completed all the requirements back in January, but snow had canceled that pack meeting. We hadn’t worked much more on his Wolf badge waiting for him to get his Bobcat badge. He was nervous, he admitted, but I told him that there would be lots of kids getting badges, so nobody would really notice him, and dad would be there with him.

His den was the second den to be called up. Everybody got a badge or a belt loop or something…except Fritz. No Bobcat badge. Nothing. When they got back to the table, I said to my husband, “Are you going to talk to his den leader, right now, or shall I?” Bill went. The den leader had made a mistake. He had completely forgotten that Fritz had completed the requirements and so he hadn’t even filled out the forms. Apparently, everybody else communicates via email to remind him of things, but we chose the old-fashioned way of telling him in person and he wrote it in his book and forgot to check it.

I felt so bad for Fritz. He was really upset, and Bill took him out and talked to him for a bit. When they got back, Bill announced that it was time to go. I couldn’t argue. How could I make him sit there and watch all the kids get some award, when he didn’t get anything (even though he earned something)?

It was a big bummer on an otherwise fun and happy day.

On Friday night, Bill and I took friends out to dinner. Their kids babysat our kids. Pete got to come along. We went to a nice place and had a great time.

It was nearly 8 pm by the time we actually got to the restaurant and Petey had fallen asleep on the way. He’s still in that nifty car seat carrier that pops out of the car without disturbing the baby. We carried him in and opted to just leave him on the floor of the tiny restaurant tucked near my chair instead of trying to squeeze a highchair at the table.

Immediately, a woman from another table comes over and asks permission to look at the baby. Permission granted, she proceeds to pick up his hand and stroke it, all while oohing and aahing over how sweet he is, how lucky we are, how she loves babies and can’t wait to be a grandmother. The four of us did the obligatory smiling and nodding, all of us internally laughing over the likelihood that she was assuming this was our first and only child and that we had no idea what the next few months would bring once the little guy became truly mobile.

And I’m also gritting my teeth and thinking that if this woman wakes up my sleeping child, I’m going to have to kill her.

Fortunately, she did not wake him up. He did wake up on his own about 10 minutes later, but went back to sleep in my arms, where he stayed for the remainder of our dinner. I regretting ordering the jaeger schnitzel over the salmon (fish is usually easier to eat one-handed), but I managed to eat it.

After all, he’s not my first and only kid.