No more free Vitamin D

In history classes, my children have been learning (OK, they have been taught, which is not the same thing) that ownership claims of new lands (the Americas) by foreign countries (in Europe) were bolstered by two things: exploration and colonization.

Now there is a woman in Spain who has registered at her local notary public as owner of the sun.  You know, the big, hot ball in the sky.  She has neither exploration or colonization to back up her claims.  Apparently, she has an infantile mind…the kind of mind that says, “If I saw it, it’s mine; if I want it, it’s mine.”

“I am not stupid, I know the law,” she says.

And what, exactly, does she plan to do with her ownership?  Charge everybody a usage fee.  My response would be an equally infantile: “Oh, yeah?  Make me!”

One would have an easier time withholding oxygen from a non-subscriber than sunshine.  Even if you put sunshine-thieves in a windowless jail, any food you would supply would be thanks to sunlight.  But she’s not stupid.  I’m sure she’s thought through this whole issue and has some sort of plan for non-compliance.

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4 thoughts on “No more free Vitamin D

  1. I suppose I better stake my claim on oxygen before it's too late. Does this woman seriously think that people will pay her a usage fee for something she has no right to claim for herself? Perhaps she should visit the sun to solidify her claim. That will solve the problem quite nicely, don't you think? (And yes, I'm fully aware of what will happen if she tries to visit the sun.)

  2. I'm making a note to claim for injury next time I get sun burnt, and seeing as I have very pale skin and can burn in the time it takes to hang my washing on the line, it won't be too long before I stake my claim

    Lesley

  3. Ooh, Lesley has a great idea. And what about those with skin cancer? Surely the owner of the sun should have to pay damages for that, as well. I wonder if her sun usage fees will be enough to cover the cost of treatment. And if we use sunblock, can we also bill her for the cost of the sunblock? After all, if her sun wasn't emitting harmful rays, I wouldn't have to buy sunblock. I suspect someone didn't consider all the ramifications of owning the sun prior to claiming it for her own.

  4. That's it. We're calling off school and living outside until this gets resolved.

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