Poor Jenny

Jenny: Mommy, can I hold Mary?

Me: I’m sorry, honey, she’s crying. I need to nurse her.

…later…

Jenny: Mommy, can I hold Mary?

Me: I’m sorry, honey, I’m still nursing her.

…later…

Jenny: Mommy, can I hold Mary?

Me: I’m sorry, honey, she’s really happy here on my lap.

At that point I realized that the answer was just simply NO. And perhaps it shouldn’t be. Even if those brief moments of contentment are cut short by the unpleasantness of being held by a Not The Momma.

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8 thoughts on “Poor Jenny

  1. Hi Michelle!Oh it’s so great to read about another mother in the military – and you homeschool. My husband is in the Navy and we’re thinking strongly of taking our son (2nd grade) out of the DODDS school (here in Japan) and homeschooling. My question to you is:Do you fight with any of your children on doing school when they don’t want to? We homeschooled before and this was a major issue. Just wondered if you had the same problem and how you deal with it?I think a lot of people who homeschool – especially those in the military who are constantly on the move!Blessings to you!

  2. Thank you so much for responding. It’s so good to know that it’s a fairly “normal” thing (the fighting) 🙂If you get a chance, please email me at angie_kasuske@yahoo.com, I’d love to talk more about this and the military.Thank you again!

  3. Poor Jenny…I hope she gets to hold Mary soon…

  4. My Mary soon learned to just start to cry the moment that Emma even looked at her. Emma still asks to hold her, but it only lasts for about 30 seconds before Mary is in a full out fit and Emma happily sings “Go back to Mama!” I am just a pawn in their world.

  5. You’re right, the answer should not be no! I always tell the kids, “She’s not my baby, she’s our baby!” And even if the baby cries, it’s worth it for the goodwill of the older children, especially the displaced “baby”.

  6. Wellll, sometimes it is best to say “No,” I think, and teach the children to understand that their happiness and someone else’s are not necessarily achieved by the same thing. Mommy needs to be in control of the comfort and safety of all the children. And, baby can be loved very well and safely on Momma’s lap, too. Holding the baby for us is rare among anyone under 12 or 13 until baby is about big enough to be crawling around on his/her own… It’s OK to set limits that make you and baby both comfortable.

  7. I agree, Lisa, which is why I keep putting her off: “holding” the baby means me helping her, which means more work for me…but that isn’t necessarily right.

  8. As we both know, you are way nicer than I am. I usually say something like, “Soon” and mean “In 6 months”.

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