It’s going to be a long football season

Billy, our renegade Bengals fan, has been conducting indoor football scrimmages with Peter. One of Peter’s earliest words was “HIKE!” Despite the Halloween dresses and tap shoes and his sisters putting barrettes in his hair and pink ranking among his favorite colors, he really is ALL BOY. And he loves football.

It’s bad enough for this Browns fan who is married to a Packers fan to have one offspring go off the deep end and pledge his loyalty to the Bengals. {Apparently, the Ohio teams are playing this Saturday, and I’ve already been informed that the Browns have no chance.} But as I dodge my little football guys who are using the hallway and the staircase for their field and I hear the littlest one, currently in possession of the ball, put the pigskin down and state firmly, “I the Bengals,” I really must draw the line.

Worst of all, my husband places the blame squarely on me as the one who spends the most time with these kids. Just before he left for school, he strictly exhorted Billy to tell Peter that he loves the Packers and to stop mentioning the Bengals. Perhaps I should consider team loyalty indoctrination as a part of my core curriculum. I’m quite sure Bill would have little objection if I decorated the schoolroom with this or this or this.

As for the game this weekend, perhaps my young football pundits are right. Even Bernie Kosar said of the current Browns team, “So many things need to get better. If Jesus was the quarterback, they’d still be 0-1.”

Ouch.

7 thoughts on “It’s going to be a long football season

  1. My husband does not appreciate when I tell Little Brother that Notre Dame is “the good guys” and that their opponent is “the Evil Empire.” But I’ve been doing that anyway, ever since he was 6 months old. You just can’t start too young.

  2. Well, we tried. My husband and I had the kids singing the Rice fight song since they were toddlers. (“Stand and cheer” came out as “stand in chairs”. Maybe that is part of the problem.) In spite of this, the oldest opted to become a Texas A&M Aggie instead of a Rice Owl. Of course it is true, that the Aggies see more victories in a single season than most Rice students see in a four-year college career. Still wouldn’t you rather be shouting “e to the x d y d x, e to the x d x. Secant tangent cosine sine. 3 point 1 4 1 5 9. Cube Root. Square Root. BTU. Compass. Slide Rule. Go Rice U!”

  3. Now THAT’S an awesome cheer. I’ll have to point my kids tomward Rice U when they’re old enough!

  4. (as she slinks off to the sidelines) I was an English major. I don’t even UNDERSTAND all the words in that cheer!

  5. Don’t worry Barb. Rice has its liberal arts humor too. The “existentialist cheer” went “We’re from Rice! Ain’t that nice! Who are you? Do you know?”

  6. Um, yeah. Buckeyes are known for our…oh yeah, bad attitude and obsession and RIOTS and hatred toward our neighbors to the north. (I’d like to blame someone about that, except I would have to blame Woody Hayes, and we all know – here in Ohio, anyway – how hallowed be his name)I was going to say we have a bit of an Ohio (pro) team split here – I’m a lukewarm Browns fan (hey, I grew up in northern Ohio!) and Bob is a pretty hot Bengals fan. I wouldn’t really care, except that EVERY.SINGLE.TIME the Browns do ANYTHING, he points it out. And then he sort of jibes that I don’t know. (I’m doing good to keep track of the Buckeyes, which I can do with some amount of accuracy.)So I’m off to write a cheer that doesn’t include slurs against a state up north. Or maybe I’ll just go to bed. No one’s going to stop cussing Michigan or cheering their losses just because of me. Not today, anyway.

  7. It should be fun in our house tomorrow. Dh and sons are loyal Browns’ fan, but also being loyal Buckeyes he and the guys aren’t big fans of “Brady the lady.” They can’t forgive his ND roots (sorry Barb). Will they root for the team but against the QB? We’ll see.Have a great Sunday!

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